|Lounging. Looking at art. You can only kind of|
do this with a toddler. And it's not relaxing.
It was a planned getaway to remember what life was like without children. To enjoy each other, and to hold on to that feeling in the midst of the frustrations that would inevitably come with having two little ones.
We had a great time. At first, it was exhilarating not being with a toddler.
I could sit in a plane seat and read.
I could eat whenever I wanted, and not stand up a million times to refill this or clean up that.
I could stand in line for 45 minutes and it was relaxing.
I could sleep all night with no screams in the night waking me up.
It was incredible.
But at day three, something happened. I realized that I wasn't just getting a glimpse of what life was like before children, but what life would be like when they were grown up.
And there was something bittersweet about that. It will be on the other side.
I wonder if I'll still wake up early and in the middle of the night because my body will cling to the memories of caring for my babies?
And speaking of being on the other side, we're through our second major virus of the month. The doctor diagnosed Anara with RSV. Since the symptoms were nearly identical to what both kids had at Christmas, I wonder if it was the same thing?
Whatever it was, four weeks of illness in a month and a half was hell.
|I love this picture. I'm comforting Finley at Christmas dinner.|
He had a fever and was getting so sick.
|Week two of illness in January; Anara with RSV.|
Carrying, bouncing, shushing, nursing, crying.
|More of the same when daddy got home.|
|Canvas painting while someone else held the baby.|
I hope I remember this season in my life and its struggles. I hope I am never flippant or disregard the difficulties of other young parents of a toddler and infant. It is no joke in terms of difficulty. I've been unemployed for nearly three years, but I've never worked harder.